Sunday, July 24, 2005
Friends
They really can last forever! I had a best friend in school, Sheri, we did everything together. I told her all my secrets and listened to all of hers, we shared or heartbreak, sorrow and happiness. We even spend a summer working our asses off together and enjoying every minute of it. Whenever I think of a milestone in my young life she was always a part of it. We stayed close for several years after we both got married but then started to drift apart and eventually our friendship nearly disappeared. We'd send a christmas card every year but that was it. We reconnected a year or so ago through e-mail and then through blogging, but we still had not seen each other to talk to for well over 10 years. Yesterday we did.
All day long my stomach was full of butterflies and my head was kinda achey with anticipation. I was so nervous, you'd think that I was about to have a sit down with the Queen of England or something...I was a wreck. I played that first hello through my head a dozen times, should I hug her, should I just stand there and look at me feet and say hi, should jump up and down and act silly....what was the appropriate way to greet someone who had once been such an important part of your life. I was so afraid that it would be like meeting a stranger, that there would be absolutely no "connection" left between us. Could I live with that? Did I want to risk it? I almost didn't go out of fear...if I didn't go I wouldn't have to face the possibility that my friend had been lost to me forever.
I did go...I did hug...I did connect. The minute I saw her standing there I knew that I had not lost my childhood friend at all, it was like we had just seen each other a day ago. I felt comfortable, safe, loved. I am so glad that I didn't chicken out, take the 'safe' route and stay home.
I would have loved to be able to spend some time alone with her but even with other people around I KNOW that our friendship has survived and that I will NOT let so many years pass between our 'face to face' meetings again.
I'm typing this as tears run town my face, I had no idea just how much I'd missed you.....friend.
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