melslifeinaNUTshell


Monday, June 27, 2005
A Redneck Thing


Setting up for the big Redneck Reunion....complete with circus tents, BBQ's, bag chairs and even a clown or two!
But gee....aint it perty?








Them girls sure do look fetchin', I wonder what's goin' on in them pretty little heads..."what did our mamma's get us into" "are these really our relatives"? "I won't tell anyone if you don't tell anyone!" "Help I've been kidnapped and forced to be a redneck!"













Yessiree...them vittles is mighty fine...did I wash that finger today....hmmmmmm "gotta love her"











"Gee bubba...what's that wet stuff down there?" "Do ya think we can walk on it?" "I Don't know Jethro...lets throw the littleun in and see what happens to him? "











The big reunion this week end went off without a hitch, the weather was hot and steamy and the company was....well.....some of it was OK.....some of it was....let's just say....less then OK. With such a beautiful week end, it would have taken alot more then a few "extra" people on the beach to ruin my day. All in all I emerged from the week-end a bit less stressed, bit more tan and with a stronger bond with one of the many, many, many limbs of hubbys family tree....in my book that makes it a huge success. However, I found a thing or two about myself that disturb me deeply. My name is Melody and I AM A REDNECK! Is there a 12 step program out there for me?

Wednesday, June 22, 2005
MOM

I was talking to a friend today about my mother, she died 1/18/2000, I miss her very much. Through this conversation and also the meme (by the way that's what my kids called my mother) 5 things you miss about your childhood, I realized that I've begun to remember only the good things about my mom. I know that when someone you love is taken from your life that you often "Perfect" their memory, that's what I've been doing with my mother for quite a while now. Not that she wasn't a great person, my teen-aged self certainly thought that she was, but when I became a wife and mother myself I realized that she was far from perfect. She and my dad had a very superficial relationship, they loved each other but there was no trust there, especially my dad with her, for a good reason. She used to lie to him all the time and hide things from him, mostly related to money, I remember her rushing to the post office to get the bills so that my dad wouldn't see her gigantic phone bill or credit card bills, she would rob peter to pay paul or borrow from me or one of my sisters to cover up her errors. Alot of her personality traits were do to her addiction to perscripton drugs, she'd been addicted to one degree or another for nearly 20 years, that I knew about. The addiction really changed her, there were days that she would just sit and drool, she's stay in bed for days on end, she didn't want her grandkids around any more, she'd bargain with me and herself, trying to convince us both that she was OK, she wasn't. The day she died the first thing I thought was...oh shit how many pills did she take, I even checked all of her pill bottles, I'm still not sure that she didn't overdose, my dad didn't want an autopsy, I think he was thinking the same thing I was and just didn't want to deal with it. It's funny how all of those memories are fading away, being pushed to the back, replaced by the good memories. Trips out of town acting like fools...she as much as the rest of us. Long talks in the wee hours of the morning usually starting with tears and ending with hugs. She was the best hugger in the world, she's wrap her huge arms around you and hold you just tight enough to make you feel safe but not so tight that you felt stifled, I miss those hugs more then anything else and I'm glad that is the memory that is the most vivid in my mind.

Monday, June 20, 2005
Perfect Day Off

I usually work on Monday's but I worked Saturday this week in hopes of getting a good day off....finally....IT WORKED! Today was the perfect day to take off. Spent it at camp on the lake, painted for a couple of hours this AM and then laid in the sun....read a good book....got a pedicure....had a good dinner and now i'm home getting ready for bed. NOW THAT IS MY PERFECT DAY. Back to work tomorrow, but the week-end is looking good...except for the "redneck reunion" that will be taking place at camp on the 25th, should be quite fun...SURE?

Saturday, June 18, 2005
YIPPEE FOR ME

I learned something new this week..IM, yes I downloaded AIM on my computer and I can now chat with friends...I know...most of you are thinking...how stupid is she...that's not exactly new technology, but it was to me. I've worked on computer for 15 years....but all I know is how to use my programs, I can play with pics a bit, but mostly just what I do at work. Seldom use the computer at home but my son left his laptop in the living room for a few days so I played around with it. It's alot of fun, I've enjoyed it. I wonder if this is how women felt when they first got to "flush"...or switch on a light.

Friday, June 17, 2005
Ten Things I Like About ME

I don't want anyone out there to think that I'm a self loathing person...I'm not. Hence....this post.

1. I like my sense of humor, I have a nack of keeping things light and funny, even the hard stuff. Guess it's my way of dealing with things I don't want to deal with...But it works.

2. I like that I am good at my job, it is the one place that I always feel competent and comfortable. There have been many times in the past 15 years that work has been my safe place...it helps that many of my co-workers are also my friends.

3. I like that, even though I am uncomfortable in crowds, I can "fit" in most any where. I can adjust my personality to fit the circumstance.

4. I like that I usually have a smile on my face...sometimes it is a fake one...but it is seldom missing. I think that when you give a smile you usually get one back.

5. I like that I am always willing to put my feelings aside and listen to other peoples problems, I may not be able to help them solve the problem but when you share a problem it usually lightens the burden.

6. I like that I am a very good peace-maker...thru years of experience I am usually able to calm the waters between people I love. I have been running interference between my siblings and my dad for years.

7. I like that I can enjoy sitting quietly with my husband...saying nothing...doing nothing...or watching and ball game or some stupid show on TV.

8. I like that I am a kind, caring, loving parent. I hope that my children someday will agree with that.

9. I like that I have the ability to get lost in a good book...to forget all else for a short period of time and just enjoy the mindless pleasure of a good story.

10. I like that, for the most part anyway, I am comfortable in my own skin. It had taken me nearly my whole life to make to this point, but I think that I have finally succeeded....usually!

This was a much harder list to write

Thursday, June 16, 2005
Another MEME

Tagged by Marti. Thanks....What 5 Things do you miss about your childhood?
But first the rules to this meme game:
Remove the blog at #1 from the following list and bump every one up one place; add your blog's name in the #5 spot; link to each of the other blogs for the desired cross pollination effect.
1. JustaskJudy http://justaskjudy.blogspot.com
2. Loose Leaf http://looseleafnotes.com
3. Lu's News http://luann919.blogspot.com
4. Marti http://marti2212.blogspot.com/
5. Melody http://melslifeinanutshell.blogspot.com

Next: select new friends to add to the pollen count. (No one is obligated to participate).
1. Sheri http://deerledge.blogspot.com/
2. Sue http://richardson-tosi.blogspot.com/
3. Julie http://thesimplethingsinlife.blogspot.com/
4. Dawney http://morningrises.blogspot.com/
5. -A- http://motherswork.blogspot.com
Let the game begin

1. I miss watching movies on the living room floor with all of my friends, while my mother gave lectures about the "facts of life", most of my friends got their information in that area from my mother.

2. I miss trips to Bangor with my mother, she usually took several of us and we would try to embarrass her, I once took off my skirt in the elevator at the hospital, I wanted to put on a new one...well I wasn't quite quick enough and the doors opened mid-change, I think she turned green. We used to flirt with the waiters and she was usually the worst offender, she was always trying to hook us up with them.

3. I miss the solitude of my room, I would stay there for hours, writing in my diary, listening to music, sometimes feeling sorry for myself, some times fantacizing about my future...planning the exciting life I would lead.

4. I miss trips to Keeps Island, my dad would drop us off, me and my friends, and pick us up a week later. We'd read smut books, play games and go skinny dipping...those were the days.

5. Most of all I miss believing that nothing bad could ever happen to me or those I love, I miss being innocent and naive, I miss the unconditional love that was all around me, I miss having no responsibilities what so ever...and to think that I though those were the toughest days of my life.

Ten Things I Hate About You...I Mean ME

Non Physical OF COURSE

1. I finish peoples sentences, I have been making a real effort to stop doing this....but I'm not always successful. It's not because I think I know it all, I think it's because I am just very impatient.

2. I bite my tongue, figuratively, constantly. I often do not say what I am thinking for fear of hurting someone's feelings. I am always editing what I really want to say. I'm not a push over I just seldom speak unless I am asked to directly.

3. I make life too easy on my kids. My kids have seldome had to walk any place, I have been a taxi service since they were born. I am also always giving them money for "fun" things. I always have their friends with me and I always pay for them. They have very little responsibility at home. I didn't have this sort of stuff when I was growing up. I'm afraid that I may be spoiling them and they won't be prepared for the REAL WORLD.

4. I seldom share my feelings. I am always listening to other peoples problems but never share my own.

5. I hate to drive in the city!!!! No explanation necessary.

6. I have a very superficial relationship with my dad. I live in fear of saying the wrong thing to him and loosing him forever. I was actually uncomfortable dancing with him at my own wedding.

7. I will avoid conflict at all cost. I hate to be in the middle of conflict, I always feel pressure to fix everything, therefor I am willing to "get over it" far too often.

8. I am uncomfortable in front of crowds. I hate to go out, especially if I have to walk into a busy room by myself, even when...or is it especially when, it's family.

9. My life revolves around my kids....and they won't be with me forever...waht then?

10. I'm afraid most of the time...of something.

I really want to work on these things.

Wednesday, June 15, 2005
Let's Pretend

My daughter will be taking her first solo trip to her boyfriends house, 2 1/2 hours away, on winding back roads, she is a very good driver and I KNOW that she will be fine, but I'm very nervous about the trip. Of course I am pretending that it is no big deal, I'm very good at that, but I have been up nights worrying about it, I've played out every worst case scenario in my head and I know that I won't get a good nights sleep until she gets home. I know that she has no idea how worried I am about it, I don't know what I will do when she is able to tell when I am just "pretending". Her first time on a plane, she was 13, my first time as well, she was sure that she was going to die, every day for weeks leading up to the flight she would say to me " I have 10 days to live...I have 9 days to live...I have 8 days to live" etc. we ended up having to give her a tranquilizer to get her on the plane, I really thought that we would have to drag her, kicking and screaming, once on the plane she loved it and still does, Well during this whole time I, too, was scared shitless but I never let on, if I had she would have never gotten on that plane, and neither would I. I guess that I will just have to look at this trip in the same manner, it will be good for her...she will be spreading her wings...experiencing something new....and hey, I'm honing my "pretending" skills. Guess it will be a win win experience.....I hope!

Tuesday, June 14, 2005
Too Young For THAT!!!!


Image hosted by Photobucket.comThis is my niece Becca (in black) and her friend Amanda, they were getting ready for the 7th grade....yes I said 7th grade semi-formal. They both look adorable....but come on....do they really need this much pressure at the innocent age of 13? Becca got a call from the boy who was supposed to be taking her to the dance one hour...yup that's what I said...one hour before the big event, he told her that he decided to go with someone else...the little RAT!  What kind of parents let there son do that to a little girl, with parenting like that it is no wonder that so many boys grow up to be complete  IDIOTS! They were just friends but Becca was devastated anyway, after getting all dressed up she spend an hour sobbing. Once she got to the dance the boy nearly killed himself apologizing to her...I'm so sorry...I made a mistake...I want to go with you...blah blah blah. I'm proud of her for standing her ground and I'm proud of her mother for not knocking her head off. There were alot of  kids at this dance who were going thru similar scenario's, I think that 13 is FAR too young for stuff like this, even though they look all grown up they are NOT, do we really need for our kids to know the pain of heartbreak before they have there first zit? I don't think so. Hugs and Kisses to Becca

Thursday, June 09, 2005
Have You Ever?

Got this off mimi's blog, though it was a bit different and I've been unable to think of anything to post for a while. Enjoy and feel free to post it on your blog.

snuck out of the house? - Not the house that I'm in now...but as a kid YES
gotten lost in your city?“NO, but I've been lost just about every place else
seen a shooting star? - Yes
been to any other countries besides Canada - Yes.
had a serious surgery? Goll bladder and apendics
gone out in public in your pajamas? - Yes, my husband hates it!
kissed a stranger? - Yes...not for a very long time
hugged a stranger? - Yes
Been arrested? - no
laughed and had milk/coke come out of your nose?No
pushed all the buttons on an elevator? Yes
swore at your parents? -Oh YEAH
been in love? - yes.
been close to love? - Yes
been to a casino? - Yes
been skydiving? - No
Skinny dipped? Yes, love it, but now ONLY in the dark
skipped school? - Yup
seen a therapist - No
done the splits? - no
played spin the bottle? Yup
gotten stitches? -Yes
drank a whole gallon of milk in one hour?“ no, way tooooo many points
bitten someone?- no
been to Niagara Falls?- Nope
gotten the chicken pox? - Yes, I was 3 months old
kissed a member of the opposite sex? yes
crashed into a friend's car -no, I'va had a friend crash into mine though
been to Japan? - No.
ridden in a taxi? - yes
been dumped? Yes
shoplifted?“ yes, I used to take the beads off from greeting cards...don't tell my kids.
been fired? Once, by my darling Uncle....dick the prick!
had a crush on someone of the same sex? No
had feelings for someone who didn't have them back?“ sure, all of my high school crushes.
gone on a blind date?“ yes...It was a disaster
lied to a friend? - Yes, I'm very ashamed of that
had a crush on a teacher? - Definitely
celebrated Mardi-Gras in new Orleans? - No
been to Europe?- No
slept with a co-worker?- No
been married - Yes
gotten divorced - No
had children- Yes, 2
seen someone die? Yes
been to Africa- no
driven over 400 miles in one day - Yes
been to US -yes, live there
been to Mexico?“ No
been to India? - No
been on a plane? - Yes
seen the Rocky Horror Picture Show? - No
thrown up in a bar? Yes, long long long time ago
purposely set a part of myself on fire? - no
eaten sushi? - Yes...didn't like it
been skiing/snowboarding? - Yes
met someone in person from the internet?- no
gone to college/university? Not to study!
graduated college/university?“ no
fired a gun? - yes
purposely hurt yourself ?“ no,
taken painkillers? - yes
been intimate with someone of the same gender? - No

Monday, June 06, 2005
Week-end "Hapnins"

The week-end was not as bad as anticipated, sister handled things a bit better this year, as did I, and I believe that the sunshine played a bit part in that. We did visit the accident site on Friday, which was NOT fun, but was necessary. Saturday AM we went Kayaking for a couple of hours to "unwind" and then we were off on our separate ways, she had family obligations with youngest and in laws and I had them with mine.

Family "B'day" party at In-laws; 90th for "great nan". I always dread these gatherings, my hubby has a very large and diverse family tree, I am always kind of scared to see what will fall out if the tree is shaken too hard. Well this Party brought out all the "nuts" in all their "red-neck, mis matched, foul talkin'" glory. Watching all of the 30 something grandmothers with there child's child on there knee, the 40 somethings with there 20 somthin' girl friends pounding back the beer and all the very bad behaved kids, being totally ignored by there own parents....made me very glad that I could leave any time that I wanted to and go back to the boredom of my every day life. It wasn't all bad though, I did get to see several people that I hadn't seen since our wedding, 22 years ago and Hubby seemed to enjoy interacting with his long lost cousins and bragging about our kids. I'm glad that he had a good time and it didn't kill me to smile at everybody and pretend that I knew who the hell they were. You'd think that after all these years I'd know them all but they multiply like rabbits!

Wednesday, June 01, 2005
OOPS!

Thought I had this pictures thing figured out but I guess that I should have resized them before I posted them, now I can't get rid of them....Oh Well. Prom was this week-end, I had 14 kids for dinner, it was supposed to be an intimate little dinner party for my kids and their dates with a couple of friends...it grew and grew and grew, the crystal got put away and the paper plates came out. They all got ready at my house too...hair...make-up...showers, this was quite interesting since I have only one bathroom. I'm still picking up pieces of Tuxedo's and wiping down glitter. Those were the days!

The Whole Gang

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