Tuesday, December 20, 2005
GRRRRRRRR!
Have you ever had one of those days where you feel like breaking something...or screaming until it hurts...or crying for hours for no real reason? I've felt like that all day today and I don't think it has anything to do with the holidays...well not in the surface anyway. I know that my stress level is thru the roof but it's different. I keep going back and forth from feeling like screaming and feeling like crying. I visualize myself sweeping my arm across the top of my bureau, which is covered with 'stuff' and knocking everything on the floor, glass breaking, makeup flying, hairbrushes crashing...Would this help...probably not because it would be ME who would have to pick it all up. Today started with a staff meeting at work...changes in the air, I HATE CHANGE!...Then I got the Mobil/Exxon bill...baby girl had put $135 thru her car this month - she has a $60 limit...then my uncle, Dick the prick-the one who told me only months after my mother's death that she'd be very 'disappointed' in my, called the office for my boss, Dick is a car salesmen (the slimey kind), then I got home and found a mess in the kitchen...not a big one...but enough to set me off. I wound up yelling at both baby girl and hubby poo, for which I later apologized, and crying for a few minutes. Right now I'm having a drink, something I seldom do, in hopes that it will take the edge off. I'm headed to the Gym with baby girl shortly...maybe sweating my ass off will be enough to make my tomorrow better then my today...maybe I should take a dozen eggs outside and throw them at the trees...maybe I should break all the dishes in my cupboard...maybe I should just stop complaining and get on with my evening!!!!! YES we have a winner.
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