Tuesday, September 27, 2005
My Wedding
This is My hubby and I on our wedding day, August 13, 1983. I was 19, he was 24 and we'd dated for only 6 months (no I was NOT pregnant). It was a very large, catholic wedding, the first on both sides of the family so everyone was there, about 300 guests, most of whom I didn't know. I cried thru the entire ceremony. Nobody had bothered to ask me if I was sure that I was ready to be married...well not until it was too late...My dad turned to me as the wedding march started plalying and said "Are you Sure honey?' At that moment the only thing that I was sure of was that I was too much of a coward to turn and run from that church. I didn't know if I was ready...I was so young...so inexperienced. I thought I was in love...but was it a marriage I wanted or a wedding...A white dress...A beautiful cake...A lovely party? Was I in love with my hubby....or just in love with the idea of being in love? I had no idea what a commitment marriage would be...how much work it was to make a marriage good. How long it would take to erase all doubt from my mind. I had no idea how difficult it would be to become part of his family (I'm still an outsider). He seemed to become a part of mine so easily. I did the only thing I could...I said I DO!
This is us now...22 years later. I am in love with my husband and I AM sure that I did the right thing. There were many difficult years...arguments....fears, we both had alot of growing up to do...we did it together. I'm still in love with the idea of being in love....I still struggle trying to be a part of 'his' family....I still wish that I'd been a bit older when I married....But I no longer doubt that we will be together forever. He is my destiny and I am his...of this I am sure!
I would recommend to both of my children to become their own person BEFORE they become part of a couple. I'd even tell them to live with someone before marrying them. I want them to both experience life with no responsibilities, except to themselves, before they have to face the reality of LIFE. I love my family with everything in me. They are My LIFE...they define me...I am so thankful that I was such a coward in 1983.
PS: That tuxedo is powder blue with a ruffled shirt...the 80's...YUCK!
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